Looking upwards

I'd love to erase my last notes..but I have no idea how.  In any case, my mood is altered..or, better said, "my mood has returned to it's comfortable norm.

Rol and I were recently introduced to "The Villages" in Florida.  We were offered a free visit to one of the homes, to the golf cart (transportation).  We had a grand time.  I was sort of like living in a fairy tale and was a great escape

Well, I guess I have to admit that I'm "over the hill"...perhaps over several hills.  On April 18 I turned into an 83 year-old.  What does that mean?  I have no idea.
  I don't feel any different than I have for the last few years.  My hair is now definitely gray but the stuff  under it functions pretty well. (well, most of the time).
  I just came home from a nice week in "The Villages" where Michael and Stef have purchased a second home.  It was very pleasant.  I like riding in the golf cart.  I would like to have a bit more time to see if I can still play golf (should not be bad if you don't have to walk the whole way). I need more than 10 minutes to get my swing back.  I'm going to find a driving range and try to recover what 30 years has erased (fat chance!)
    The world seems to be "full of sounds and fury...signifying something I'm sure.  It doesn't usually come very close to me; but I recently sold  the old double-decker bed and the one of the men who came took it upon himself to announce that the Jews are the whole problem in the world. ..He's a Muslim.
   To be honest, I was stunned!  I did not expect to hear any words like that in my home.  I didn't respond at all.  Looking back I think that was wise; but I wish he had just said thanks for the bed,and the sheets and blankets I had thrown in) and left in peace.
    I worried about them coming back for several days and gave thanks to the Almighty that I own a rather large, but peaceable dog who is part  Irish Wolfhound.
     But since then I have regretted that there doesn't seem to be any solution to the hatred that is overrunning the world again or maybe I should say, "still running over the world."  Hatred like that blurts out without cause, takes it's anger out on anyone in the room, or in the world, has no logic, no limits, no purpose.
    Dear Lord, please bring meaning, understanding, forgiveness, kindness, and peace to this very confused and sorrow-filled world.

My mouth runeth over.

On one hand I'm fine.  On the other hand,I'm uneasy and disappointed in me. 
I seem to have a case of "foot in the mouth" or perhaps it is better described as "can't you just listen, Joan"
I've been blowing it left and right.  I was asked to lead a group in a Presbyterian Ladies Circle in a "bible study (notice the small "b").
The subject was "water" ..creation was the opener.
I thought it would be interesting to include a discussion of "how big is this creation".  The local newspaper had just published a discussion about an unmanned rocket that landed on a comet many million miles from earth; and I included it as an opener ("how big is the creation we have to consider").  That went over pretty well.
But then (at the next meeting) I opened with a newspaper clipping from a fly-by rocket of Pluto that was even further out.
I never got to include the findings of water on Mars (which followed the first two articles).  The leader effectively complained that they were not interested in my "education".  I was dismissed..
I still think it's interesting to contemplate the size and significance of God's creation.  But I'm fired.

Next I was asked to join an evening bible study.  If anyone had a bible with them, it was invisible.  The leader talked about himself and ("graciously") included me in tales of his earlier service to the Lord.
I should have hidden under the chair or something because it went on and on and on...and was of no interest to anyone (including me).  The second week it picked up where the first week paused and I allowed myself to be entangled again.  No one is gaining anything except contempt ..I need a place to hide.
I not only feel like a jerk; I'm sure I am one...and old one. Lord help me  to honor you somehow.

No earthly good?

No Earthly Good?

At 82 I am wondering what is my purpose in being here.  I remember when I was a young woman  when all the world was open to me...and a middle aged woman when many opportunities had been exercised, most successfully...and now, frankly, in my old age (gosh it is hard to say those words)

10 The days of our lives are seventy years;

And if by reason of strength they are eighty years,

Yet their boast is only labor and sorrow;

For it is soon cut off, and we fly away."

"Make room for those who come behind!"  Nice words, good intent, but painful to those who see themselves still on the trail still leading upwards into the garden. And yet life is a continuum...those years spent here. . . and then those that follow which are without count. 

    

This picture was taken right after Hurricane Sandy

This is our house.  We built it in 1998.  It sits on 32 pilings driven to refusal and stands across the street from the Toms River.  
Two days before Hurricane Sandy (then expected to bypass us) arrived, I woke up with a sentence in my head, "My proud waves with stop."  On impulse, I typed it into my computer and discovered that it is a quote from Job 38:11.  
That was a big surprise because Job is not my favorite book in the Bible, and I don't remember it in any other context.  However, there it was..."My proud waves will stop"  ..out of  context but hanging in my mind.
In any case, during the next two days Hurricane Sandy was joined by a Northeaster and blasted its way across the barrier reef, carrying houses, roads, and sand in front of it.  ''Sandy" tore the area apart, damaging and destroying as it went and headed up our river. 
Our neighbors, Kevin and Janine, called us on the phone.  They wanted us to move up the hill behind us and to stay with us.  We decided to go, but did some dumb things.  We didn't move my new car from the garage.  We didn't block the front of the house with sandbags or, for that matter, anything else.  We didn't bring food with us or clothing. 
We ended up staying at our neighbors for three days.  We wandered downhill toward our street only to be blocked from it by a flood.
Kevin decided to put on his wetsuit and take a camera with him.  The picture he took from the floating boardwalk is the one at the top of this page.  
When we finally were able to return we found a miracle had occurred.  Our house, although surrounded by water, was untouched.   The boardwalk had ended up on our front lawn, our neighbor's stone "Madonna" had been washed into our garden.  The water had stopped at the porch, gone around the house, stopped at the door of the garage, filled the pool with mud, washed out the wetland, and flooded the basement of the house behind us.  It left our house untouched.
We had trouble convincing our insurance company that there was no water in our crawl space.  Three men examined it and came to to the same conclusion...it was dry!  
Our insurance company said it was impossible..Despite their examination they sent us a check for $2000 (+) and we deposited it in a special bank account.   They insisted that we must have damage.  But we did not....and we sent the money back to them early the following fall.  
The Lord had given us a wonderful gift...our house was safe...but He also gave us another gift...His word does not return to Him void.  He keeps His promises!  He has the power to grant what He wants to grant.  He has blessed us over and over again....not because we are special...but because we are His!  May His name be praised!!!!

Winding up or winding down?

Well, here I am again...older? (yes), wiser? (hopefully)
Rol and I celebrated our 60th wedding anniversary May 30th.  60 years!  I had trouble believing that I was 60 years old, and now I am 82.
How can it be? I can still drive a car, mow the lawn, make rational decisions (at least I hope they are rational)
Jesus is still the anchor that holds me, the hope that makes every day worth while.

Rol and I went sailing to celebrate our anniversary....I think there must be salt water in our veins.
We sailed on board the largest square-rigger in the world out of Malaja, Spain. It carried us acorss the Mediterranean to the port of Rome, down the coast of Italy, to Sicily and back to Rome. We had a grand time.
It may be our last trip, but it was a wonderful one.
However, Roland just returned from a trip of his own...to the hospital with a return of difficulties with his heart..But he came home in time to celebrate his 84th birthday surrounded by 14 members of our family (may the Lord bless them for coming, working, preparing, and rejoicing with us).

Now, our lives resume again, cautiously but also with faith.  The Lord continues to bless us, protect us, and encourage us...what more can we ask?!

Rainy days are for reminiscing.   and for anticipating.

Five years have passed since I wrote about Millie...She's buried in our back yard in a garden full of roses!  And, when I'm weeding, I talk to her. But the Lord sent us a new puppy and the past seems less painful.

"Shadow" was a wonderful surprise...I'm sure the Lord sent her because we had no intention of filling the "dog hole" in our lives after Millie passed on.  

     We saw her advertised  in the newpaper and decided to "look and see!"
 She quickly left the other puppies, sat down in front of Rol, and spread her little back legs into Millie's "frog position." 
     She had been born on our anniversary and bringing her home was too hard to resist. Suddenly, we were dog-owners, caretakers, trainers, and at peace once again.

     Shadow was supposed to be a Labradoodle.  We met her parents before we said, "yes." 
     Her dad was a very large lab and her mother was a good-sized poodle...We didn't want a lap-dog; but as she grew  we suspected that our "labradoodle" had other family ties. And, one morning as we left Pet Smart with our latest Shadow-food, we ran into what appeared to be her twin..  
     I smiled and asked if, by chance, the approaching puppy was from the same litter as Shadow.....
     There was a short pause, and an insulted response..."Our dog is not a mutt...she is a Irish Wolf Hound"  
     Whoops! they looked like twins. My Shadow had a secret past!   
     She has been growing ever since, but not as much (thank you, Lord) as might be expected from her now-known ancestry.  At 3 she weighs in at 75 lbs.. And she's smart!  Amazingly smart!  She can (and quickly does) identify friends and not-so-comfortable strangers, She "talks to us"  letting us know what she needs, what we need to know, and who she likes!
     She pulls our arms off when we try to walk her on an open leash, but patiently trots alongside of me on a short leash when I need her. 
     When I weed the garden, I still talk to Millie. 
     I've told about her about Shadow and believe that . . .somewhere, some day.. in heaven they will meet and play and delight the Lord who chose to send them both for us.